Alfred, is this what you had in mind???

It must have been a terrible year in 1994. Was this the best they could come up with? How did they arrive at such a decision? I imagine the procedure went something like this:

Welcome everyone, tonight is a very important night where we gather to appoint the winner of the Noble peace prize. Are there any suggestions? A few murmurs are heard throughout the crowd... "How about Mother Teresa??" Crowd gives a sigh of approval. Sorry folks we already gave her one, the rules state we can't give anyone two!! "Gandhi!" crowd cheers!! Come on folks he's been dead for quite some time, the rules state we can't award any dead people. "E.T.!!" crowd gives off a deep huummmmmm! Alrighty we're getting out of hand here people, we can't give it to E.T.!!!!

The suggestions continue. "Rosa Parks!" "Pope John Paul II" "Joan Biaz!" The crowd is out of control, they are proud of their suggestions! I think we are getting closer now, you're on the right track. Than one boldly stands up and silents the crowd "Yasser Arafat!" The crowd bolts out in laughter. The mediator gives a motion of silence and lets him speak regarding his suggestion.

"Alrighty now hear me out people. Yasser and his killing machines have murdered 10% less innocent woman and children in the year 1994 as opposed to 1993." Crowd gives off a deep hummmm. "Although he tells his own people he wants to wipe Israel off the map, he did mention to us that he has peaceful intentions." Crowd starts to clap!! "Although he did keep 90 percent of the money given to the Palestinian people for himself, he did give some to his people" the crowd starts to clap and cheer!! "There are still two people left in the world that could possibly be bigger scum bags than him! Sadam Hussein and Bin Laden" the crowd now on their feet out of control. "He also has lots of medals on the coat he wears, and a really cool turban" the crowd starts jumping all over each other in excitement!! The mediator barely able to speak due to his own excitement, so I think we have a winner here, we don't even need to vote!!!

A unanimous decision on Yasser Arafat being awarded the coveted Noble Peace prize. I'm sure Alfred Noble would have been proud!!